– – – It's not you, it's me. I think you suck. – – – I mean, if I had a son, and he brought me something heart shaped, it had better be that way because that's what it looks like when you cut it out of the still living animal's chest. – – – HA! VICTORY! MY EVIL KNOWS ONLY A COUPLE OF BOUNDS!!! – – – If he throws some coaching at you, put on this paper sack. That'll keep you safe. – – – Madison County, Mississippi has just what you would expect from Mississippi. Southern Belles are walking on every street. Every where you turn there is a beauty waiting to meet you, if you're lucky. You don't hear about it a lot outside of Mississippi, because the boys there don't want to share-can you blame them? And a lot of stuck-up city-slicker types think that people from Mississippi are all redneck hicks and hillbillies. You are obviously thinking of Neshoba County. The beauty of the women of Madison County is only matched by the depth and breadth of their personalities. The old money of Mississippi started in places like Tupelo, Biloxi, and in the delta, but the capitol kept the fresh flow of money coming to Jackson. And with wealth comes the fineries, and they kept their houses in Madison County. There were many times I drove to Madison County, just to enjoy the natural scenery. And there is lots of wildlife, if you will, in Madison County, Mississippi, and all of it good hunting land. I remember walking around Madison County, and not being able to walk 10 yards without being able to throw a rock and hit a pretty girl. There's a lot of pretty women there. And a lot of cops, too. It was in the prison there, in Madison County, where I got my tattoo. – – – I've been long a proponent of taking some form of standardized test for people wishing to engage in relations. Now I'm thinking we need sex licenses. I'm serious. You know how every once in a while you find someone you think shouldn't be allowed to breed? Get their license revoked. How to calm down that 15-year-old? Make 'em fill out 17 pages of forms. Okay, so I get a driver's license by virtually going back into the driver's license place and saying, "I haven't killed anybody, renew me!" They always do it. Should be the same thing for sex licenses. Then we'd probably get that pre-marrital sex thing gone, since the paperwork would just be a deal-breaker. Imagine filling out your logbook, and your partner is on his/her 7th book this month. Would you still wanna hit that, considering this was your seventh entry? the reverse works the same way. Yes, I realize that there would be a fair amount of black-market stuff going on. Fake licenses, trumped up logbooks cutting out or putting in tons of pages. But we've got the Government mucking up almost everything else with taxes and fees, why not sex? – – – I like my women like I like my coffee: ground up and in the freezer. – – – I told you that using my time tested method of taping the legs together has many benefits. Among them are that the kids can't do all that running, and another benefit is that they will never ask you to baby sit again. – – – I like my women like I like my coffee: hot, and strong...with a spoon in them. – – – How do you tell the human rocket that he no longer has a job? Can't really say he's been fired, now can you? – – – I swear to all that is holy, if I ever hear somebody say something about "the secret Cotillion emails" I'm gonna start pumping a Wal-Mart full of lead. And THEN see the look on the store manager's face when the health inspector says the paint has to come down and they have to redo the entire interior, costing several hundred dollars. THEY WILL THEN KNOW MY WRATH! – – – What does jiggy mean, and why are we all to "get with it?" – – –

status: published
lastmod: '2006-12-12T20:31:46.000Z'
author: John Stansbury
type: page
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  similarterms: county madison mississippi women license licenses good beauty people pretty money hear thinking walking pages driver thing coffee stuff fake
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